⏳ Erebus Growing | 0029 - Who you are is reflected in everyone by you

Welcome to Erebus Growing, a weekly email where I share little snippets of life to help you change and grow into your highest life.

After a week away at a conference, I’ve come back to quite a bit of work. I’ve got a lot ahead of me at the 9-5, but I’m excited.

Similarly, I’m debating if my time at the part-time is coming to an end. They’re not respecting the availability I provided them and it’s getting close to impacting my 9-5, which is far more critical.

I’ve got some decisions to make, and I don’t know exactly what I’m going to do just yet.

On a good note, I’ve finally completed the first step of the Public Service Loan Forgiveness program (PSLF) here in the United States. Turns out that I have 20-21 months of qualifying payments left to make.

This is extremely exciting because student loan debt is a major issue for me. Decisions that young Jeff made that older Jeff would do differently on some level. Alas, another story for another day.

👨🏻‍💻 Meditation

I had a different topic on my mind for this week, but reading Dan Koe’s newsletter yesterday caught my mind.

I used to be a Christian. Evangelical with some level of pentecostal mixed in.

I remember the time I prayed to be “saved.” And I remember how, when I was in the throes of my new belief as a teenager (a sophomore in high school if I remember correctly), I looked at the people around me and couldn’t understand how they didn’t get it.

I couldn’t understand how they couldn’t see the sin they were living in.

I needed them to understand what I knew and how they would benefit from it.

How getting “saved” would grant them entrance to heaven.

I was some type of teenager.

But I saw, at the heart of who I was at that moment, a reflection Koe’s comment that “[we] are conditioned to reproduce [our] identity.”

It reminds me of how our actions, whether intentional or not, are always to bend the universe to our own will.

The average will always strive to preserve themselves over others.

We each do it in our own lives. We make decisions on what to do, when to do it, how, where, and so on, in ways that benefit ourselves.

It also plays out in building our ideal lives.

Recall that the best way to change our lives is piece by piece, to make small decisions that align with our highest selves and become who we’re meant to be by being who we’re meant to become.

The one thing that we always have to be careful of is forcing our own identities onto others.

While the magic in the human experience comes from the intersections of our lives, the problem with the human experience is that we are limited to our own.

We move throughout our life as the center of the universe.

There may be times when we focus on others, but ultimately, we always ask the question: “How will this affect me?”

Because we can’t see in someone else’s mind, we have to interpret their actions through the lens of our life.

And in doing so, we try to understand why they do what they do in light of our lives.

We suggest things to them that we would do. We unconsciously reproduce ourselves in them.

That is the challenge we face.

How do we separate ourselves from the other? Should we separate ourselves?

It is on us to identify a way to support others while allowing them to live their own (just as they do for us).

I’m no longer a practicing Christian. As my beliefs evolved and as I started to question some of them, I was pushed out.

I’ve never gone back and quite frankly don’t have a desire to, but that’s a story for another day.

📚 Inspiration and Resources
Every week we all consume content and I share my favorites here.

Write.
I’ve started diving back into software as I start seeing my life building out. For a long time, I’ve been debating about building a second brain and struggled with where I’d want to build it. I got back into Obsidian over the past couple of weeks and, while I’ve barely scratched the surface, I see why people are enthusiastic about it. Give it a try here.

📓 Journaling Prompt
Journaling is one of the most important things to do when exploring our own lives. A new prompt for you to use this week is below.

How do you support others in your life with decisions you don’t think are right for them?

Until next time, I wish you enough and send you off with love and a sense of urgency in your life.